Mom...
i don't know what this feeling is called as..
but i feel it is so hard for me..
i thought i used to live alone, away from you..
i thought i was independent at my age, 21..
i thought i could live alone far away from you..
but i missed it..
mom, i couldn't..
i remember yesterday..
when suddenly the necklace that you gave for me..
broke off...
i felt so bad..
i remember i texted you after i realized my broken necklace..
you told me you and all are okay...
i still messed up...
when i need to complaint to creator of universe..
i felt no place for me...
i am so angry...
with all the things happened to me these days...
that i could not find my 'home'..
that i have no place to complain
no where to go
no one to share
suddenly my tears dropped..
i need place to scream..
to shout all my thoughts out
i remember this day..
April 6, 2012..
in the cold night 8 degree at that time..
with the wind blew my everything..
i was walking...
taking one round walking around campus..
i was crying..
i was shouting..
i was screaming..
i remember my feet felt so cold
till i felt i could not walk anymore..
do you know, mom?
the wind blew my tear drop..
and now i am waiting..
to stand on my feet..
mom, believe me..
I'll be back...
April 6, 2012
International Hall, 307
Handong Global University
Pohang-si, Gyeongsakbuk-do
South Korea
